A Bad Trip to the Saladbar
- Adventuring On
- 2020-07-13
- Commentary
-
- Retelling
- Suddenly the bard's
rhyme scheme changed
Hoping his lines would be
less deranged
Instead of a rhyme
in every line
The bard decided
alternating was just fine
We saw a skeleton
With the head of a cow
We looked at each other
and said, "what now?"
Juniper,
having panther fun
Made a run
at the skeleton
She pounced upon
His boney mass
But failed to knock him
On his ass
Vale took a shot
at Saladbar
But shot instead
into the floor
Lyrad strung her
bow of long
And once again
her aim was strong
Saladbar's shoulder
Took the shot
Yet still remained
Deep in thought
Will aimed her bow
Straight at the ball
Hoping to break it
Once and for all
Her arrow seemed to
Glance right off
We thought we heard
Saladbar scoff
Hoj sent flames
towards Saladbar
Hoping to light him
from afar
His bolt caught
Saladbar's cloak
And it burned him bad
And that's no joke
But Saladbar maintained
His focus
We did not interrupt
His hocus pocus
Sneaky Mugs
approached the cow
And hit it's knee
So it yelled ow
George Michael
serving as his muse
Rys Arbeon
Took his cue
And whispered
With some dissonance
At Saladbar
From a distance
We found Saladbar
Could not resist
The whispers upon
Rys' lips
But still his focus
Did not break
Which was bad for
All our sakes
Our surprise attacks
Were now all done
It was time for our foes
To join the fun
Lyrad shot at
the minotaur
But the arrow didn't
Get too far
Mugs attempted to stab
The big bovine
And managed to almost
Snap its spine
She followed that up
With a short sword stab
And took off another
Boney slab
Juniper was
next to fight
And worked hard to
Maintain line of sight
As she attempted an
Acrobatic feat
Which she pulled off
Which was freakin' neat
Flanking the dumb,
Boney bullock
She bit and hurt
That stupid ox
On Saladbar, Vale left
his hunter's mark
And charged forward
Deep into the dark
His sword slashed
Into flaming Saladbar
And drew some blood
But barely scarred
Infestation
Was Fenn's game
At Saladbar
is where he aimed
Saladbar resisted
The many bugs
In fact, he seemed
To barely shrug
The minotaur
heaved its ax
To return Mugs
Vicious attacks
Mugs ducked
Out of the way
And lived to fight
Another day
Selene shot out
A frosty ray
In an attempt
To save the day
It struck the
minotaur square
And gave the beast
Some wear and tear
Skeleton two rushed
towards the paladin
And stabbed its sword
In all the din
The paladin
took a blow
And found his Hit points
go quite low
Our panther was next
to take a wound
Deep inside this
dreadful tomb
To Saladbar
The paladin ran
As if he had
A clever plan
To give the foe
A mighty blow
But Saladbar's focus
Did not go
Once again Rys
Whispered Dissonance
But found Saladbar
Unconvinced
Will was stabbed
But a bony thug
While off a blow
Hoj's armor shrugged
Will swung her sword
At her attacking foe
And dealt it quite
A mighty blow
At Saladbar,
Lyrad shot
But hit him
The arrow did not
Mugs once again
Stabbed the ox
And made sure that
its world was rocked
She followed up
with a short sword
But failed to see
That dumb cow gored
Panther Juniper
was next
Time to see the
Minotaur wrecked
Her bite snapped
The bull's vertebrae
And down it went
And down it stayed
At the chanting fiend
Vale took a pair
Of swings and neither
Passed through air
They hit the villain
Square and true
But the evil chanting
Wasn't through
Fenn tried to
Give touch of chills
But failed due to
A lack of skills
Selene shot the foe
With a frosty blast
But the skeleton
Seemed to last
The skeleton tried
To strike at Fenn
But was too cold
To move, in the end
A skeleton swung
at Juniper
And managed to
Totally miss her
Hoj decided to
Use a command
"Halt" was
His simple demand
The necromancer's
Chanting stopped
Hoj's spell could
not be topped!
Rys took a deep
deep deep breath
And blew out a cone
of fiery death
The charred skeleton
still stood
But was no longer
Looking so good
Will took a hit
From a boney foe
And Hoj also
Took a blow
Will clawed into
His attacker
And the fiend
Looked quite knackered
He followed up
With a swift head butt
And showed that skeleton
What was what!
Lyrad ran forward
and towards
a skeleton she
swung both swords
The skeleton was
rent in twain
And to the ground
its bones did rain
Running through
minotaur bones
Mugs struck at
a boney drone
She decimated
the osseous beast
And returned it to
the state "deceased"
Juniper lept
at Saladbar
Her slashing damage
Didn't go far
"Slash slash"
Went Vale
But only one strike
Impaled
Saladbar
was most unharmed
The fighting party
Was becoming alarmed
Fenn's dagger found
His attacker's jaw
And off its head
Did he saw
Selene loosed a
Frosty bolt at Saladbar
But it went wide
and it went far
Hoj wondered if
his fire bolt
Had badly hurt the
chanting dolt
But chose to swing
his sword once more
And knocked a skeleton
To the floor
Rys once again whispered
In Saladbar's ear
And seemed to cause in him
Some fear
He rapped his drum
For Juniper
And sent inspiration
Over to her
At Saladbar
Will did strike
An action that
He did not like
She broke his nose
And with her claws
Gave him another
moment of pause
Then Saladbar uttered
a single word
And froze everyone
When it was heard
With that all
of our party died
Except Juniper who
was still alive
But Saladbar
was not done
He flickered around
And had some fun
Saladbar gloated that
he could not be stopped
And that his magic
Couldn't be topped
He turned himself
into some mist
And then he made himself
Dismissed
The group all
faded into black
And Will wondered if
it was a nap
Some time long passed
But then we all woke
And saw that dawn
Had finally broke
Our wounds had healed
We were alive
The whole scenario
Felt contrived
After all
We should be dead
But now we were
Whole instead
We found a bag
Full of supplies
And right before
Our very eyes
Out spilled out
Lots of magic stuff
Identifying it all
Was tough
But after time we
came to see
That most was tailored
To our party
Down Town
We climbed up out
of our deep dark hole
And found a town
hard to console
Rampart was in
a dire state
No one seemed
to be doing great
The tavern keep
assailed us all
as we watched her
poor face fall
Magic had been
stripped from this town
and everyone was
feeling quite down
Juniper figured the
Silent Spell
had been cast
and brought this hell
All of the
defenses in town
were magically based
and now were down
For now, on the DL
our magic, we'd keep
And try not to utter
a magical peep
For fear that our
magic would cause a riot
So we better not even
dare to try it
We opted to bunk
down for the night
to ensure we stayed
out of sight